A Haiku about Tuesday

I wish that I was
Someone whose spaghetti fits
Neatly in the pan.

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Occasional Terrible Poetry: An Exceptionally Poor Contribution To (The Brilliant) National Poetry Month

My publishers*, Salt, posted this fabulous poster for National Poetry Month on their Facebook newsfeed. It’s part of a gorgeous, funny, clever campaign that the creative team clearly had loads of fun with. I would personally like to buy the t-shirts of pretty much all of them.

I wasn’t the only person to feel compelled to post a reply in verse. But I’m pretty damn sure mine was the worst.

A TWILIGHT VERSE
Vampires used to be bad
A fantastic Victorian fad
But then Edward and Bella
Became a best-seller
And now the whole thing makes me sad. 😦

*If I live to be a hundred and ninety-eight million billion years old, it’s faintly possible that I may finally get tired of the phrase “my publishers”. But it won’t happen before that.

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Occasional Terrible Poetry: Limerick Prompt

Written to The Prompt: A Limerick With The First Line, “There Was A Young Man From Vancouver”

There was a young man from Vancouver
Who didn’t understand limericks, like, at all.
On the other hand
He was quite good at Haiku
But, no-one liked them. 😦

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Occasional Terrible Poetry: The Jar Of Nastiness

From: May, Ian
Sent: 10 June 2011 15:53
To: ‘Deborah May’; Louise Fowle; ‘Cassandra’; ‘judy may’
Subject: Wednesday, bottled

This was the outcome of my Wednesday’s work. I have to write a technical report on it.

Ian

From: Cassandra
To: ‘Ian May’; ‘Deborah May’; Louise Fowle; ‘Cassandra’; ‘judy may’
Sent: Saturday, June 11, 2011 12:13 PM
Subject: Re: Wednesday, bottled

You know, what that report clearly needs is a bad haiku, as follows:

Jar of nastiness
What the hell do you contain?
Better not to know. 

C x

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